I have just received
an email from our estate agent in the UK who tells me that my property is
being maintained in a ‘reasonable’ order (I don’t like the sound of that!)
He says: “The tenants feel that an annual rent increase,
regardless of currently prevailing economic conditions, would be unfair. An
increase this year may be uncalled for.”
Co-incidentally, within the hour, our landlord here in
Mumbai called to tell us that we can expect a ten per cent increase as from
next month. End of.
Mr. Malkani is a businessman and only speaks English when it
suits him. You can be in the middle of a sentence when he will suddenly say
“hello, hello” and walk off. This leaves me perplexed and lost for words, which
is exactly why he does it.
I tried telling him that we had made many improvements to
his property at our own expense. We’d had every room painted and put up
shelving and safety bars at the windows. We keep the place immaculate and pay
12 months in advance. We are perfect tenants and therefore (using our own
tenants’ words) an increase this year may be uncalled for.
“Hello, hello” he says, “rent is ten per cent more” and off he waddles. I am not going to fight this
because the idea of going through the whole business of moving house again is
too much to bear. I am also going to acquiesce to my tenants because; on the
whole they are good and pay on time, even though the rent for my lovely home
does not quite cover the mortgage. We are taking the hit from both sides.
Of course, Mr. M is a professional landlord who bought a
white box and stuck some tenants in it. Mick and I, on the other hand, are
emotionally attached to our Kent home, it’s where we brought up our children
and invested all of our savings.
I wonder if our tenants read one of the ridiculous stories
about us in the British press recently where they had us “living like royalty
in a five-star luxury compound” with an obeisance of servants. (As regular
readers will know, we spoke to a freelance journalist who asked us to say a few
nice things about Mumbai and then contorted the facts to suit himself and the
nationals) Anyhow, maybe they read it and decided we didn’t need the extra
money –who knows?
If only they knew that in reality I have to sit under a tap
to wash as the shower has never worked; the toilet seat regularly slides of the
toilet and the raised gas hob is so precarious that once again this week I have
suffered third degree burns to my hand. (A pan of boiling oil slid effortlessly
off the hob and onto my hand, which now looks like something out of a horror
film. The kids won’t let me anywhere near them with it!)
Sometimes, as I sit
under the tap, I think about the two state -of-the-art bathrooms we had fitted
only months before we knew we were coming to Mumbai. Or when I am cooling my
poor, blistered, skinless knuckles in a bucket of ice, I think about my kitchen
at home and my five-hob Britannia oven. I used to be able to cook a leg of lamb
and all the veg all at the same time. There is zero chance of doing that here
when all I have is four dodgy gas rings and a microwave. Even if I knew where
to get a decent joint of meat, I wouldn’t attempt it for fear of blowing myself
up. No, if it’s the maid’s day off, I’m ringing for take-out.
Can you tell I am having a Bad India Day? Sometimes when I
miss my home and family life as it used to be, I ask myself why we are doing
this. Why are we living 4000 miles away from friends and family in a
two-bedroom white box?
And then I remember… it’s great for Mick’s CV, we are putting
money away for the kids’ education and there is also fantastic opportunity to
travel. So shut up Lindsey and take the crunchy with the smooth!
Let’s talk about the good things!
When my son came out for the Easter holidays we went to
Indonesia and Singapore. We stayed in a couple of fabulous hotels and did all
the touristy things: Sentosa Island, the Night Safari and Universal Studios. The
children were happy and our short time together as a whole family again was
very special and dear to my heart.
I tell you what else was very special and dear to my heart…..THE
SHOPS!
Whoaaa! How many malls does Singapore have? What I loved about it was that every one
(except my husband) was in a mad, shopping frenzy. I even saw a group of
Buddhist monks swooning in the window of Louis Vuitton.
Yes, yes I know buying designer stuff is only an attempt to
fill an unfillable void in my soul but whatever, it makes me happy. It makes up
for having to sit under a tap to wash or for having to take my life in my hands
every time I fry an egg.
I look around Mumbai and I see people who would have to work
for a year to earn the money it costs to buy a designer bag. It’s enough to
make you weep. I get that, I understand, but something deep inside me still
wants the bag.
So…. some news…..there has been a new addition to the
family. One minute I was walking along Orchard Street in Singapore and the next
I was in the Mulberry shop buying an Alexa. WTF? I didn’t even see it coming.
There was no planning for this baby, it was a happy surprise, unlike my oldest,
a classic Bayswater, which, like a longed-for IVF baby, was years-in the
planning.
